“Do not be anxious or worried about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, continue to make your requests known to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding, stands guard over your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7 AMP

This is a bit of scripture offered to me for strength and comfort not too long ago by a dear sister in Christ who has become a treasured friend. Her advice at the time was to write it down and paste it everywhere…my house, my car, my desk at work, and anywhere else I could find. I did exactly as she suggested, which has provided me with a constant reminder of how to manage my fears and worries, as well as what God gives me in exchange.

My husband and I were having a conversation last night about how easily we allow ourselves to fall into the cycle of stress and worry. I shared with him something I heard from Joyce Meyer last year, which has really stuck with me. She was discussing her own battle with a particular worry at the time, and said she heard God speak to her heart on the matter, saying to her, “Joyce, are you going to choose to fellowship with me, or with your problems?” He was letting her know that it’s not possible to do both. If we truly trust Him and choose to entrust Him with our problems in life, then we have no reason to continue to carry the worry over what will happen or how they will be resolved.

What a profound realization that was for me. Whenever my focus is on the things causing me heartache and struggle, then my focus is not on God, and thus not on doing whatever He needs me to do that day. It’s a selfish focus. In my mind, I began to understand that whenever I’m focused on myself and worried that something is not happening the way I want it to, I’m not focused on the things of the Lord. Moreover, I’m not trusting that God is better equipped to work things out the way they need to be than I am.

Along those same lines, when I continue to beat myself up for a mistake or bad choice I’ve made, even though I’ve asked God for His mercy and forgiveness, I’m essentially saying that the price paid on my behalf by our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, was not sufficient. I’m implying that my own suffering is needed on top of His in order to earn the forgiveness I so desperately need. For me, this has been complicated by a desperate need to have the forgiveness of someone I love, and because of their unwillingness to extend that forgiveness, I’ve continued to feel the pain and ramifications of that one mistake.

What I’m starting to understand is that the only forgiveness that truly matters is that which I’ve already received…God’s. Yes, I still feel a deep sense of pain and struggle with the emotional ramifications on a human level, and I still long for the forgiveness of that person I hold so dear. But I am beginning to grasp that I don’t deserve the pain, and I am feeling more and more sadness at all of the lost time and all we are missing out on because of fear and stubbornness. We are missing out on so much love, laughter, and much needed sharing of burdens, and there isn’t a single thing I can do about it except give it to God. I will admit, that has been the single most difficult endeavor I’ve ever faced.

What are you holding on to that you need to hand over to God? How much time are you spending focused on the things that worry you? How often are you choosing to fellowship with your problems instead of fellowshipping with the God who loves you, allowing yourself to feel the peace of God guarding your hearts and minds? For me, the answer is far too much time…but I’m working hard to rectify that choice and instead continue to shift my focus back to the things of the Lord whenever I realize my focus has drifted off course. I pray with all my heart that each person who chooses to read these words will begin to do the same.

“But Jesus looked at them and said, ‘With people [as far as it depends on them] it is impossible, but with God, all things are possible.'” Matthew 19:26 AMP