Think about the last time you went out to eat or spent time at a family gathering. I can’t speak for anyone else, but I can say that the picture here is an all-too-familiar sight, both in public and in private. While I can see a great deal of value in the wide variety of avenues of communication that now exist throughout the world, I can also see the dangers of getting lost in cyberspace. Because of various social media websites, I have had the blessing of being reconnected with a number of people I love dearly who now live all over the globe. Unfortunately, there can be a down side to these websites, as well. We have started to sacrifice quality time and memories with those in our lives here and now for time spent perusing through the then and there of cyberspace. We are showing our parents, siblings, children, and friends, that there is always someone or something else that is more deserving of our attention than they are, even though they are the ones physically sitting right in front of us.

I don’t think there is an intentional effort to communicate this particular message, and to be honest, I don’t think we are truly cognizant of the message we are sending to those around us. Early last year, my 11 year old nephew let me read a list he’d made titled, “106 Things That Annoy Me,” and yes, it made my heart hurt a little that he was able to come up with 106 negative things to include on that list. One of the things he listed that really struck a chord was basically that he hates when people don’t look up from what they’re doing when he’s talking to them. He and I had a discussion on that one, and what he told me was that it hurts his feelings when he is trying to talk to someone and sees them continually look at their phones throughout the conversation. He said it makes him feel like they aren’t really interested in talking to him.

I’d be lying if I said I haven’t experienced the same feelings as my nephew more often than I care to admit. I remember years ago, when I worked at the Children’s Hospital in Chapel Hill, NC, we would have a monthly “dinner out” for anyone on our staff who wanted to join in some social fun. One thing my dear friend Stacey would say when she saw somebody on their cell phone during dinner was, “Hey! Put that away, it’s family time!” Now, she was mostly just teasing, but we all understood that the purpose of our being out together was to actually BE together. I’ve always loved her for her gift of perception and her willingness to speak up in defense of our intended quality time. She is and will forever be my brain twin!

Can anyone remember the days when we actually drove 20 minutes home from work, and were completely unavailable to the rest of the world during that time? Can anyone remember going out to dinner with people you love, and actually having a conversation with them instead of with someone who wasn’t even sitting in the restaurant with you? There is a great deal of discussion in the Bible regarding the importance of fellowship, both with God and with one another.

“In Him [and in fellowship with one another] you also are being built together into a dwelling place of God in the Spirit.” Ephesians 2:22 AMP

There is definitely power in numbers, and I can say without a doubt that I’ve gained a tremendous amount of strength from time spent with brothers and sisters in faith. We are given the opportunity to guide one another back towards the Lord, to help each other see things through the filter of the Holy Spirit, and encourage those we love to move forward in faith and love. Fellowship is a critical component to living a life of faith. It’s not about religion. It’s not about being socially accepted. It’s about a family of believers coming together to help each other do our best to live a Christlike life. It is not our place to judge whether or not someone else is living their life according to what God wants. That place belongs to nobody except God Himself. It IS our place to love, support, and accept each other as we are, and do our best to share the gifts and abilities God gave us for His edification, and therefore the edification of our fellow human beings. If you find yourself trying to sit in judgment of someone else, you’d best find a way to check your judgment at the door and see the beautiful spirit God placed inside of them, instead.

All of this being said, if we do not give our time and focus to those around us, how can we ever truly know them? If we continue to place the flow of text messages, emails, and social media notifications higher in priority than the souls sitting right in front of us, we will continue down the path of disconnection that we’re currently traveling. Next time you pick up your phone, tablet, or whatever device is close at hand, maybe you need to take a minute to check on what is happening around you, and then consider what is truly the higher priority in that moment. Believe it or not, the world CAN go more than 5 minutes without hearing from us…and the moments we are given with those we love are fleeting and will one day no longer be available, so choose wisely.

“Therefore if there is any encouragement and comfort in Christ [as there certainly is in abundance], if there is any consolation of love, if there is any fellowship [that we share] in the Spirit, if [there is] any [great depth of] affection and compassion, make my joy complete by being of the same mind, having the same love [toward one another], knit together in spirit, intent on one purpose [and living a life that reflects your faith and spreads the gospel–the good news regarding salvation through faith in Christ].” Philippians 2:1-2 AMP