Love the Hand of God

I’ve spent many years trying to gain a deeper understanding of the quote, “You have nothing to fear but fear itself.” They are words that have felt very meaningful, but I’ve never been able to pinpoint the underlying truth of them.

I now understand why they feel so empowering. Fear is Satan’s greatest weapon in the battle for our minds. When we allow ourselves to be overtaken by our fears, we are allowing the enemy an opportunity to direct our paths.

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.”
‭‭Joshua‬ ‭1:9‬ ‭NASB‬‬

There is nothing in this world greater than the power of God. It’s vital that we come to truly understand and trust the blessing and protection which comes with accepting the sacrifice of Christ.

I’ve lived most of my life under the weight of my fears. They’ve driven me down far too many dark paths. They’ve had me convinced that this life was going to succeed in breaking me. However, God has always had a different plan for me, and the path I’ve walked is evidence of His continued love and guidance.

I love this country. I see so much more good in us as a nation than I do bad. We have our struggles, just as all humans who have walked the planet. We can do our best to do the right thing and still we will fall short because imperfection is our natural state. Still, I’ll choose life here over anywhere else without fail. In fact, it was the day I joined the military that I began to stop answering to my fears.

My daddy served in the army during Vietnam and my grandpa was a sailor during WWII. The military is something that I’ve always felt drawn towards, but I was so afraid of basic training, I couldn’t bring myself to enlist.

Then, at 34 years old, I found myself suddenly unemployed and without direction. Right then, hurricane Katrina hit, bringing the National Guard troops into action. This giant lightbulb went off in my head, and I knew this was my chance to serve the citizens of the country I love in the same way I was watching those Guard troops serving the people hurt by that storm.

I decided that my need to do something to help was bigger than my fear of basic training. I decided that NOT doing something I was being called to do simply because I was afraid of it was unacceptable, so I joined the Army National Guard.

I survived basic training, though my daddy received many a letter written with a tearful desire to give up. When it was time for my next phase of training (AIT), where I would learn to do my job as a combat medic, I faced an entirely new challenge.

On day one, our company of about 460 medics-in-training were given the introduction and explanation of what to expect over our next four months. Then we were told of one additional, albeit optional, goal: to succeed in earning a place as an “Honor Medic” upon graduation. For the first time in my life, I saw something I really wanted to earn, and I had enough confidence to hope I could do it.

To become an honor medic it was required that I maintain an academic GPA of 3.5 or higher (we were certified as EMT’s during the first phase of training). It was required that I pass all physical fitness tests, have no disciplinary issues, and pass all practical skills tests on the first attempt. When graduation day came, there were around 350 medics left of the original 460, and of those 350, there were 11 soldiers who achieved the goal of being an Honor Medic… and yes, I was one of them!

From there my life in medicine and the military moved hand in hand. I became a nurse and I served a year in Iraq with my military family. Those are stories for another day, but without making the choice to set down my fear and accept my calling, I wouldn’t be where I am today.

God will always give us what we need to move forward away from our fears, but only when we’re willing to let them go. We have to trust His strength more than our weakness. We have to trust the path He chooses, always asking Him to show us where we are placing our own will and wants above His.

In trust, we find peace.